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Today in Cake News:

Swearah went to get a new hearing aid this morning, has ended up with a fishing rod and a sea fishing licence… Apparently they thought she said Herring Aid…

Hanna and Vicki no longer fit into their lockdown Jeans, so have complained to the clothing retail consortium for mis-sizing clothes…

Anne went to the Steampunk festival in Thirsk, but realised she was both a) in the wrong week and b) in the wrong town…

Cat has gone on a new record 100km cycle ride. She’s now in Weston Super Mare, waiting for Darren to come and pick her up.

Adele has advertised open auditions to film for her new advertising campaign and has been inundated with floods of TikTok celebrities (Alright it was a trickle – Hanna said she’d do it if she got a free hairdo and Lee settled for a box of unsold Happy Savage)

Ness has emptied the Inverness Tesco of gin and is frantically practicing for #ginhour and Mike has not mentioned cake once. We’ve sent a carrier pigeon up to Marie to see if he’s ok..

And finally, Hanna has rewritten Frozen and has submitted it to Pixar….